Today's been an interesting day. Procedures are actually working in lab . I managed to do decently in a riding lesson supposedly a level above where I ought to be . Received a postcard in the mail from a good friend who lucked out and made it onto the Vomit Comet for the second year in a row (thanks Joe... and boy am I jealous). And even after spending a few hours in lab alone listening to U2 (Beautiful Day... such a good song) and feeling kinda melancholy, came back to the house expecting to go straight to sleep, but detoured to Tunnel for some interesting and varied conversation... and ended up listening to a 1:30 AM jam session with Mike, Phil, Chuck and others. Ahh, music. =^) And now, I'm writing.

Ok, ok, I grant that I was being fairly pessimistic last night - a friend who's gone through something similar to what I have called me on that. (I blame exhaustion - I was half-delirious with sleep deprivation last night - and a slight return of bitterness.) While I'm not going to recant everything I said, I'll temper it with a few other remembrances for balance: solid, comforting hugs in the face of sorrow and depression; an anchor to cling to in the ever-shifting sea of life; eyes warm with love and pride; words to melt a soul and make a heart brim over; feeling in tune with someone else, feeling alive as never before. In any case, it's currently a closed book, as far as I'm concerned. I'm not bitter or angry (though I was for a while) but I am hesitant to jump right back into the fray and risk everything all over again. We'll see.

I'm sorry... for me, learning to move on meant trying to forget the good memories and living for the present. Thanks for the reminder - I'll try to keep things in proper perspective from here on out.