First things first: Happy Birthday, Dad! :)

Everything else:
-best batch of in situs ever. here's to hoping they improve overnight... but at least I've found a protocol that works. hooray!
-finished Emma, began Hunt for Red October and Patriot Games. Clancy's a better author than I remember...
the updated reading list:
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
Sense and Sensibility
Hunt for Red October*
Patriot Games*
Grapes of Wrath (H 142)
Days of Obligation (H 142)
Neurobiology text

*=in progress

-watching sense and sensibility for the second time in a week. probably should've just practiced flute instead; I wasn't in the mood for another "everything works out perfectly in the end and no one's dreadfully unhappy" jane austen novel... I woke up feeling a little down, and for some reason, lab drained me this afternoon. I came back to my room feeling like I needed a hug, took off for food at Pie 'n Burger, spent the whole time talking to Dad, Mom and Kat on my cell phone. I would've given anything to have one of them here... at least everyone's well and happy at home, including the dogs.
-I'm ready for a change of pace. Never thought I'd be ready to speed up time until term begins, but I think seeing a mix of new and familiar faces will do me good, and I want to know *now* whether or not I can handle this course load, whether I'll end up dropping 150 or 142, what happens when everyone gets thrown together again, how I'll hold up this year (though I honestly think I'll be absolutely fine in all regards).
-considering a friend's recent advice to not take emotional issues too seriously. Perhaps you're right; you usually are in matters like this. I need more time to consider this one though... sure, the world won't end if I'm wrong and choose the more difficult path. It didn't when I messed up so royally last year - in fact, I learned a whole darn lot slogging through life the hard way. But after making the mistakes I did last year, I'd rather avoid any pain as much as possible, whether it be mine or another's... but I'll try to relax and see what happens.

It is funny though, that I should have two people give me the basically the same advice about two different aspects of my life within a couple weeks. The last person who told me to relax was Davee, one of the riding instructors at TES. She'd asked each of us in her class to think about our strengths, weaknesses and fears dealing with riding, and tell her sometime. I finally came up with some ideas - but no real pattern, mainly scattered little points where I was improving or needed improvement. After class one night, I approached her and related what I'd come up with.
"Ok..." after listening to me, then "You're right on all the little things. But I perceive your real strength to be your focus. Whenever I suggest something to you, you immediately work to correct it - and you improve. On the other hand, this is also your main weakness - your focus. You concentrate so hard on fixing what's wrong that you forget to relax when you're in the saddle, and that's just as important."
Next mission: Focus on relaxing, and see what happens.

Anyway, I'm gone to practice flute and go sleep. Night all.